A marriage is supposed to be forever, and the first few months of forever are easy enough. But as the years drag on, the bills pile up and the kids start arriving, the fun and games of early marriage start to fade away. But you can keep the romance and spirit of your marriage alive – it just takes a bit of work
Start Dating Again
The best way to keep the romance alive in a marriage is to remember what put it there in the first place. Go on dates as regularly as possible. A date is an outing where the two of you leave the kids behind with a sitter or set up a rendezvous with a movie and take out after the kids are safely in bed for the night. In short – no kids allowed.
Don’t just spend the "date" sorting laundry or running errands together. Sit close, cuddle and maybe kiss a little. Laugh at the funny parts of the movie and talk about your hopes and dreams. Enjoy your time together, even if it’s just a couple of hours a week – that may be all you need to stay connected and feel romantic.
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Surprises
One of the best ways to show you care about someone is to bring them little treats and surprises that are meaningful especially to them. Candy, cards and flowers are always a nice treat, but if you know your wife is working hard to lose weight, swing by the yogurt store and bring home some fat free frozen yogurt in her favorite flavor. Or, buy her a romantic nightgown or dress to hug her new shape. Just be sure the surprise is for her not you.
Tender Words
A great many people are verbal communicators. They need to speak and hear the words to feel loved. But unfortunately, romantic words are often replaced with the basic tasks and instructions to get us through the day. If you find you’re not telling your wife how much she means to you, find little ways to tell her. Whisper it to her at dinner. Leave a small handwritten note by her sink. Buy a card and put it on her windshield first thing the morning so she can start the day off with a lift and a smile.
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Behind Closed Doors
Finally, keep the romance alive by acting out that romance in the bedroom (or any other room of the house.) Keep things lively and interesting. Take turns on the kind of evenings you have. If you like sex one way, and she likes it another, alternate activities and foreplay so that nobody feels slighted or left out.
Look at new activities together to find something that both of you agree would be fun to try. Then have a good time – sex shouldn’t be boring. Find ways to make it fresh and interesting, even if it means stepping outside of your comfort zone or giving in to just one more massage before the real action gets started.
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